Song Playing: Suffocate by Cold, now its Just Like You by Three Days Grace Mood: None in particular Other feelings: uhhh...
well i havent blogged in here for a little while.. hm... dont liek this one as much as the one i have at aetheri.com
so i'll tell what has happened this past 2-3 days..
i'll start with friday at 7. went to the guard party at mag the hag's house. fun stuff there. we ate and acted like fools and ate and acted like fools and ate and acted like fools... (you get the point, i hope.) we also watched blow with the wonderful johnny depp :D mm mm mm good
well as the night went on... we went outside at one in the morning to wake up.. we sorta went through the maze in maggie's backyard. then we went to the front yard. yeah yeah yeah. we went back in and had "orgies" (hahaha) we learned things that we have not learned before about one of our ex-instructors...(ewwwww) and other misc. things...
some other hours passed. it was round about 3 or later and we were still up... margaret's mother went psycho insane-o on us, took our energy and started yelling... (uh oh) well needless to say we were MUCH more quiter after that... but not completely silent...
well most of everybody woke up at 7, including myself. around 8 we woke up maggie and maggie's mom woke up too.. (dum dum dum) she was significantly nice. and we talked about the animals she used to have.. a deer and a cow and chickens and what not. i think the deer's name was max and the cow's name was elizabeth... and told stories associated with them. it was entertaining until it was time to go... then maggie and her mom got in another fight.. eh... families... anyways... went to practice and unfolded the mat for mag's mom so she could paint it.. it took 25 freakin minutes to do it... it was slimy and the paint made it stick together.. it was not fun.. well then we went and got breakfast from mcdonalds which also took forever cuz it took forever for them to fix the food.. gah... anyways, we finished practice then we had to bring the mat back into the band room so mag's mom could work on it in the afternoon. blah blah balh. went hoem with mom. we stopped at target to get cds and a seat cover. I FINALLY GOT A CROW LEFT OF THE MURDER!!!(incubus's new cd for you people that dont know what im talking about) *scores and wooshes) then we went to wal mart, got a pretzel dog and mom got the rest of the kids some lunches for tomorrow.
came home and took a shower. i was going to refuse to go to sleep until 7...
well needless to say, it didnt last.. i fell asleep at 4, lol. well then i woke up at 5.15 to son on the phone wanting me to go to the mall, i told him no because i was wayy too tired. then i fell back asleep imidiately. haha. woke up at 6 to one of rachel's friends, i think it was danielle. but rachel was at her friend's house.
then i fell asleep for the rest of the night, i would wake up at random times because my body told me to wake up because it had enough sleep, but i fell asleep again. but anyways. mom came and got me up at 7.30 cuz thats the time she normally wakes us up for church, i stayed in bed till 8, turned the tv to starz and watched the rest of chicago.
went to church did the church thing, came home, listened to incubus, washed my clothes, did some of my homework and got on the computer.
fun fun fun now im doing nothign and my mom is cooking supper.
well im still in search of a nomad to walk with me today.ive tried a couple of people but theyre not home :cry: son might go with me but im not sure what his deal is. eh.. he needs a ride or something. YAY i might have someone to go with. woosh for me.
alrighty, so here the deal.. when this blog went psycho on me, i switched to a different blog provider or whatever you want to call it. but now i cant decide which one to use. the other one is very plain and simple and you cant do much with it but i kinda like it. this one you can do way more stuff with it and what not... so people who read my blog... YOU decide..
Today i was having a decent day. everything went fairly well.. i came home and everything was good for a while then i just became all sad for no reason and wanted to cry. i still do feel that way... i dont know why and it scares me.. it just feels as if i have absolutely no point of being here. i dont have anybody to comfort me... its just like this great sadness.. i can usually hide it with a mask of happiness, but it doesnt work.. i dont know whats wrong.... i just feel like i want to die... my heart hurts... :cry:
heres a song..
One day I woke up I woke up knowing Today is the day I will die
Cashdogg was barking Went to the park and enjoyed it one last time I called my mother, told her I loved her And I begged her not to cry
I wrote a letter I said I'd miss her And I signed that Goodbye
[Chorus:] You know the happiest day of my life I swear the happiest day of my life Is the day that I die Can you feel the cold tonight (the day that I die) It sets in, but it's alright (the day that I die) Darkness falls, I'm letting go (the day that I die) All alone but I feel fine (the day that I die)
We took a drive and we drove thru D.C. To see the places we lived, long conversations We talked of old friends and all the things that we did
Summer nights Drunken fights Mistakes we made Did we live it right
[Chorus:] You know the happiest day of my life I swear the happiest day of my life Is the day that I die Can you feel the cold tonight (the day that I die) It sets in, but it's alright (the day that I die) Darkness falls, I'm letting go (the day that I die) All alone but I feel just fine (the day that I die)
[Chorus:] You know the happiest day of my life I know the happiest day of my life I swear the happiest day of my life Is the day that I die Can you feel the cold tonight (the day that I die) It sets in, but it's alright (the day that I die) Darkness falls, I'm letting go (the day that I die) All alone but I feel fine (the day that I die)
Did I live it right, I hope I lived it right, Did I live it right? (the day that I die) Did I live it right, I hope I lived it right, I know I lived it right (the day that I die)
1. If you could build a 2nd HOUSE ANYWHERE WHERE WOULD IT BE? anywhere that snows during the winter 2. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING? shirts 3.FAVORITE PHYSICAL FEATURE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX?eyes 4.THE LAST CD YOU BOUGHT? uhh... 5. WHERE'S YOUR LEAST FAVORITE PLACE TO BE? at home cuz its really boring 6. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE PLACE TO BE MASSAGED? i have never received a massage 7. WHAT'S MOST IMPORTANT, STRONG IN MIND OR STRONG IN BODY? mind
8. WHAT TIME DO YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING? 6.45-7
9.WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE KITCHEN APPLIANCE? i dont know
10. WHAT MAKES YOU REALLY ANGRY? when people complain about everything 11.IF YOU COULD PLAY AN INSTRUMENT, WHAT WOULD IT BE? umm i dont know 12. FAVORITE COLOR? silver or black 13. WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SPORTS CAR OR SUV? um.. 14. DO YOU BELIEVE IN AFTERLIFE? yeah 15. FAVORITE CHILDREN'S BOOK? cat in the hat 16. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? autumn 17. IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPER POWER WHAT WOULD IT BE? the ability to mind read 18. IF YOU HAVE A TATTOO, WHAT IS IT? no :-/ 19. CAN YOU JUGGLE? haha 20. THE ONE PERSON FROM YOUR PAST YOU WISH YOU COULD GO BACK AND TALK TO? i honestly dont know 21. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE DAY? none 22. WHAT'S IN THE TRUNK OF YOUR CAR? dont have a car 23. WHICH DO YOU PREFER SUSHI OR HAMBURGER? sushi 24. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLOWER?dont know 28. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MEAL? i dont knwo
my moods have switched from being happy to being depressed in a matter of seconds...
yet another day in my so uninteresting life.. fun...
well i went to the orthodontist today, (thats why i wasnt here 1st-3rd hr, like any of yall care..) they said the next few appointments are going to be longer and shorter apart for some "fine tuning"... yay.. well i got to school during 1st lunch... did nothing... woo funn um got into french.. did a bellringer and french like stuff... choir we sang till round about 1 then he worke on peoples solos. i attempted to study for my biology test the next hour.. osmosis didnt work.. eh... :-/ bio we took a test and surprisingly i made an 80 w/o the curve... fun stuff.. then went to bacon and learned about hyberbolas! (fun stuff.... ha. .ha.. ha..) went to brous room to see if i could make up the test this afternoon, obviously she wasnt there because the door wwas locked... :-/
came home did some math and did nothing and now im doing nothing and talking to no one... fun fun fun in a barrel...
now heres a picture and song..
=http://img19.photobucket.com/...
Being For The Benefit of Mr. Kite by The Beatles
For the benefit of Mr. Kite There will be a show tonight On trampoline.
The Hendersons will all be there. Late of Pablo Fanques Fair; --late of, as in "formerly" What a scene.
Over men and horses, hoops and garters, -- not garders Lastly, through a hogshead of real fire; -- hogshead is one word, it's a type of barrel In this way Mr. K will challenge the world.
The celebrated Mr. K Performs his feat on Saturday At Bishopsgate. -- again, one word, placename
The Hendersons will dance and sing As Mr. Kite flies through the ring. Don't be late!
Messrs. K and H assure the public -- messrs, anachronistic abbrevition Their production will be second to none And, of course, Henry the horse dances the waltz.
The band begins at ten to six When Mr. K performs his tricks Without a sound
And Mr. H will demonstrate; Ten somersets he'll undertake -- it's spelt like this, old word for somersault On solid ground.
having been some days in preparation, -- not "they've" A splendid time is guaranteed for all And tonight Mr. Kite is topping the bill.
i blogged a fairly decent sized blog and it dindt go through
so heres a song
nowhere man by the beatles
He's a real nowhere man, Sitting in his nowhere land, Making all his nowhere plans for nobody.
Doesn't have a point of view, Knows not where he's going to, Isn't he a bit like you and me?
Nowhere man, please listen, You don't know what you're missing, Nowhere man, the world is at your command.
He's as blind as he can be, Just sees what he wants to see, Nowhere man can you see me at all?
Nowhere man, don't worry, Take your time, don't hurry, Leave it all 'till somebody else Lends you a hand.
Doesn't have a point of view, Knows not where he's going to, Isn't he a bit like you and me?
Nowhere man, please listen, You don't know what you're missing, Nowhere man, the world is at your command.
He's a real nowhere man, Sitting in his nowhere land, Making all his nowhere plans For nobody. Making all his nowhere plans for nobody. Making all his nowhere plans For nobody.
well yeah, stuff happened with jenny and tis be very sad... i like cried last night for her... :cry: *sigh*
um well im gonna go see gothika tonight with mi familia, ma famille, my family. yeah. not much happened today. eh...
heres a picture and a song
=http://img19.photobucket.com/...
pushing me away by linkin park
I’ve lied to you The same way that I always do This is the last smile That I’ll fake for the sake of being with you
Everything falls apart even the people who never frown eventually break down The sacrifice of hiding in a lie Everything has to end you’ll soon find we’re out of time to watch it all unwind The sacrifice is never knowing
Why I never walked away Why I played myself this way Now I see your testing me pushes me away Why I never walked away Why I played myself this way Now I see your testing me pushes me away
I’ve tried like you To do everything you wanted too This is the last time I'll take the blame for the sake of being with you
Everything falls apart even the people who never frown eventually break down The sacrifice of hiding in a lie Everything has to end you’ll soon find we’re out of time to watch it all unwind The sacrifice is never knowing
Why I never walked away Why I played myself this way Now I see your testing me pushes me away Why I never walked away Why I played myself this way Now I see your testing me pushes me away
We’re all out of time This is how we find how it all unwinds The sacrifice of hiding in a lie We’re all out of time This is how we find how it all unwinds The sacrifice is never knowing
Why I never walked away Why I played myself this way Now I see your testing me pushes me away Why I never walked away Why I played myself this way Now I see your testing me pushes me away Pushes me away…
guess what... I FINALLY GOT MY CAMERA!!!!!!!! (hoo ha and big score and super duper woosh) plus it was cheaper than it was... 169.99 oh yeah! (i have twenty bucks left over) AHH super cool. oh and son got his first kiss hehee haha (if you read this son, dont worry, no one reads my blog except for katie and i think jenny. )
well back to school tomorrow. im going to bed at nine cuz i need my sleep. im gonna fill out this survey thingy and put it on here
BODY ILLS AND SKILLS --
Nervous Habits?: tapping my feet, biting my lip/biting my fingers (well theyre kinda like boredom habbits too its a two in one combination type thing) Are you double jointed?: uhhh... i dont know Can you do weird things with your tongue?: i can make a three leaf clover (its kinda weird looking but i can do it...) Can you raise one eyebrow at a time?: i can raise my left eyebrow by itself but i cant do the right one by itself Can you blow spit bubbles?: yeah Can you cross your eyes?: Yep Tattoos?: i wish Piercings?: ears Do you make your bed daily?: HAHA nope
-- WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU --
Kissed?: my mother Hugged?: myself Talked to?: myself Went on a date with?: actually, ive never been on a real date Laughed with?: myself Hung out with?: sloane and amber and morgan and andrew and matt and katie and phillip and daniel
-- WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU --Took a shower?: Last night. Cried?: probably a couple of days ago Talked on the phone?: yesterday Read a book?: umm Punched Someone?: today, my little brother
-- CLOTHES --
Which shoe goes on first?: um whichever i feel like Speaking of shoes, have you ever thrown one at anyone?: haha nope On average, how much money do you carry with you: well for the past two months $160 because i couldnt spend it now nothing What jewelry do you wear 24/7?: my necklace Favorite Piece of Clothing: uhh i dont know Pajamas: i dont wear pajamas, tshirts
-- FOOD --
Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it?: well i dont cut it and sometimes i twirl Have you ever eaten Spam?: eww no Favorite Ice Cream Flavor: coffee How many cereals in your cabinet?: 2 probably What's your favorite beverage?: other than water and orange juice or grape juice, dr pepper What's your favarite resturant? uhh id ont know Do you cook?: not usually
-- GROOMING --
How often do you brush your teeth?: at the very least once How often do you shower/bathe?: daily How long does your shower last?: uhh 20-30 Hair drying method: there is none Do you paint your nails?: ony my toe nails but i havent had time lately
-- MANNERS --
Do you swear?: occaisonally Do you ever spit?: only when im sick
-- WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE --
Animal: umm i don tknow Food: umm whatever catergory sushi falls in, i think its japenese i also like chinese Month: october Day: friday night, well only because i dnt have school for the weekend but then i get all depressed like cuz i never do anythign and yeah... nvm Cartoon: uhh there are a many Shoe Brand: uhhh Subject in school: none at the moment Color: silver Sport: uhh TV show: umm Thing to do in Spring: um nothing Thing To Do In The Summer: sleep Thing To Do In Autumn: uhhh Thing To Do In The Winter: run around like a decapitated chicken(i dnt know
-- IN AND AROUND --
The CD Player: jimmy eat world Person you talk to on the phone: last person i tlaked to on the phone was son Ever taken a cab?: no Do you regularly check yourself out in store windows and mirrors?: haha i avoid it What color is your bedroom?: um not sure Do you use an alarm clock?: not technically Window seat or aisle?: uhh i dont care
-- LA LA LAND --
What's your sleeping position?: stomach Even in hot weather do you use a blanket?: yeah Do you snore?: i dont knwo.. Do you sleepwalk?: when i was little Do you talk in your sleep?: not that i know of Do you sleep with a stuffed animals?: used to Do you fall asleep with the TV or radio on?: yeah
-- WHICH IS BETTER --
Coke or Pepsi?: dr pepper One pillow or two?: two Deaf or blind?: blind Pools or hot tubs?: pools are cool but hot tubs are cool too Blondes or brunettes?: uhh... TV or radio?: depends tic tacs or Certs?: tic tacs Tall or Short?: tall. Sunrise or Sunset?: sunset Hamburger or Cheeseburger?: well it depends Morning or night?: night Sports or news?: well some sports are ok and the news lies so i dont know Christmas Eve or Christmas Day?: um none of the above Cake or ice cream? both Spearmint or Peppermint?: spearmint Bath or shower?: i always take showers, i havent had a bath in a loooong time Book or Movie?: both Green or Red apples?: green
-- THE FUTURE --
Where do you see yourself in ten years?: uhh jobless and husbandless :cry: Who are you going to be married to?: ummi dont know How many kids?: well if i dont have a husband, its kinda hard to have kids, unless i go around having unprotected sex... eh which i probably wont do Your profession: umm a bum
i dont feel good. i feel like i want to vomit. i just burped and it tasted like the peanut butter and syrup sandwich i had yesterday. this isnt very good... my head hurts and i havent eaten anything today except a hunny bun (maybe two) and a dr pepper at church... anyways um went to eat at miyako's yesterday at 7.30 some fun stuff there, eh? well katie (yanez, not feather or cox) was causing trouble because she was late and ther was no room at the table and blaming sloane and them and she sat at a table next to us and then when her waitress came by asked to be moved to a table the furthest away.. we told her we could have added a table or we could have crammed into that table but she wouldnt have it. her date was already there and when she was sitting next to us, her date asked if it was ok for him to go sit by her and she said no and that she had a new date (which was amber who she brought with her) yeah it was chaotic, but she apologized at the end of the night (well that evening after everyone ate) and thats about it.
went to church today and came home, kinda picked up my room and now im about to burn a crap load of cds for my teacher...
now its time for a picture and song
=http://img19.photobucket.com/...
this ruined puzzle by dashboard confessional
This ruined puzzle is beige with the pieces all face down.
So the placing goes slowly. The pictures of anything other than it's meant to be.
But the hours they creep The patterns repeat Don't be concerned You know I'll be fine on my own. I never said "Don't Go" (don't go)
But I've hidden a note It's pressed between pages that you've marked to find your way back. It says...... "Does he ever get the girl? " But what if the pages stay pressed The chapters unfinished The stories too dull to unfold? Does he ever get the girl?
This basement's a coffin I'm buried alive I'll die in here just to be safe. I'll die in here just to be safe.
'Cause you're gone I get nothing and you're off with barely a sigh I never said goodbye.
But I've hidden a note It's pressed between pages That you've marked to find your way back It says... "Does he ever get the girl?" But I've hidden a note That's pressed between pages That you'll read if you're so inclined Does he ever get the girl?
But the hours they creep The patterns repeat Don't be concerned I know I'll be fine on my own. I never said "Don't Go" (don't go)
hmm its valentine's day... (what fun..) and i have received absolutely nothing! (woosh) i didnt even get anythign from my parents.. i dont think anybody else did either, but they usually get us candy or something. hmph..
well today is going to be a rather dull day. ive got a li ttle math homework to do. umm what else.. oh yeah, im going to miyako's tonight at about 7.30 with my friends (score) but theyre all going to twirp (unscore) but anyways. i might go to natalie's. i dont know...
well i woke u p at 10.30 (thats kinda later than i normally get up..) hm anyways.. so now its like 12.40 (fun fun fun) i need to burn some cds... but i dont feel like it now. anyways...
picture and song (get it faster by jimmy eat world)
=http://img19.photobucket.com/...
I don't care what you do I'm getting out No, nothing ever shames me Don't want a thing from you I'm going out I don't care if you're angry
Aoh Aoohhh I'm getting out No, nothing ever shames me Aoh Aoohhh I'm going out I don't care if you're angry
I should have thought things through I'm holding out Not getting an answer I want to do right by you I'm finding out That cheating gets it faster
Aoh Aoohhh I'm holding out Not getting an answer Aoh Aoohhh I'm finding out Cheating gets it faster (Repeat once more)
(another instro-[mental] break)
I don't care what you do I'm getting out No, nothing ever shames me Don't want a thing from you I'm going out I don't care if you're angry
I should have thought things through, yeah I'm holding out Not getting an answer I want to do right by you I'm finding out That cheating gets it faster
Aoh Aoohhh I'm getting out No, nothing ever shames me Aoh Aoohhh I'm going out I don't care if you're angry
Aoh Aoohhh I'm holding out Not getting an answer Aoh Aoohhh I'm finding out Cheating gets it faster
well howdy to the avid readers of my oh so wonderful blog... and thats about 2-3 people, including myself, and that counts as two, maybe three. but who knows?!
anyways....
happy friday the 13th! hope everything went spectacularly horrible today!
bleh
not much happened today at school, except for me basically failing my math test. woosh, isnt it great!?!
yep yep...
anyways. lets go have sex lol jk
AHGSADHGSADHGFHGSHDGHSDHG HDGHAIGLKSDGHI
heres a pretty picture and a song... hmm bother by stone sour
=http://img19.photobucket.com/...
Wish I was too dead to cry My self-affliction fades Stones to throw at my creator Masochists to which I cater
You don't need to bother; I don't need to be I'll keep slipping farther But once I hold on, I won't let go 'til it bleeds
Wish I was too dead to care If indeed I cared at all Never had a voice to protest So you fed me shit to digest I wish I had a reason; my flaws are open season For this, I gave up trying One good turn deserves my dying
You don't need to bother; I don't need to be I'll keep slipping farther But once I hold on, I won't let go 'til it bleeds
Wish I'd died instead of lived A zombie hides my face Shell forgotten with its memories Diaries left with cryptic entries
And you don't need to bother; I don't need to be I'll keep slipping farther But once I hold on, I won't let go 'til it bleeds
You don't need to bother; I don't need to be here I'll keep slipping farther But once I hold on (once I hold on)... I'll never live down my deceit
Song Playing: The tv in my parents room Mood: angered/pissed off Other feelings: sad
lets recap the day, shall we?!?!
1st hr- we worked on out show. hm guess who sat out the WHOLE ENTIRE FREAKIN TIME :x (BETHANY!) ok, now why the hell she sat out, i have no freakin idea. something about her breaking up with her boyfriend. she needed to buck up and work and stop feeling sorry for herself.
2nd- we watched the old romeo a nd juliet and made fun of it and romeo's codpiece.... LMFAO (my day was pretty good after that)
3rd- sanders, did free enterprise work
luuunch (yum yum gumbo)
4th- french french AND MORE FRENCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (wow.. who would have guessed!?!)
5th hr- choir, i sang, wow.
6th hr- biology, he handed out worksheets and we worked.
7th hour- algebra 2, went over work thats not complicated but tideous...
then practice after school (this is when the day went from great to down beneath the bowels of hell...) hmm well bethany came in and was like all angered cuz some girl was "threating" bethany and crap and the only reason why she broke up with jimmy was to get back with matt and thats why that girl and matt broke up (which kinda sounds like something bethany would do..) but anyways... on to practice, we practice, and practice and more practice, sarah's mom comes in and does maggie's make up. ok she asks us to judge which looks better and what not, we told her which one we liked better and told her to do something slightly different because it looked like she was punched in the eye. she did so, even tho we didnt like it extremely well, we were satisfied.. (bethany said it looked like crap and wanted to change all of, we didnt do that so bethany got pissed and said no one listens to anyone's input.. which she does do and she would MIGHT listen to bethany if she were nicer in the way she says stuff) well then we run through the whole show once and maggie goes around asking everyone what they messed up on, we tell her and when she gets to bethany, bethany says she doesnt know what she messed up on and she couldnt think because she was concentrating on getting on to the rest of the show or something like that but she didnt even list one thing she did wrong. i mean come on, you know at least ONE thing you messed up on. (oy...) so shes in a pissy mood for the rest of the practice. she doesnt get over it or anything , she still stays in that mood and all that stuff. so you know what it does to the guard, it makes them mad too because they see one person not even trying and not even looking like they want to be there. its like osmosis/diffusion. she just wants attention or some crap like that. she just needs to get over herself. i was pretty pissed, but i didnt act pissed around the whole freakin guard so i wouldnt get them in a bad mood. but honestly, she needs to hit upside the head with a big stick of reality. she needs to realize that life will get way more complicated than guard and that life isnt fair and it wil never be fair. so she just needs to get it. (im not even joking, im so annoyed with her right now... ugh)
now i'll add a picture and a song, a cetarain shade of green by incubus
=http://img19.photobucket.com/...
A certain shade of green, tell me, is that what do you need? All signs around say move ahead. Could someone please explain to me your ever present lack of speed? Are your muscles bound by ropes? Or do crutches cloud your day? My sources say the road is clear, the street signs point the way.
(You gonna stand around till 2012 A.D.? What are you waiting for, a certain shade of green? I think I grew a gray watching you procrastinate. What are you waiting for, a certain shade of green?) (CHORUS)
Would a written invitation signed, "Choose now or lose it all," sedate your hesitation? Or inflame and make you stall? You've been raised in limitation, but that glove never fit quite right. The time has passed for hand-me-downs, choose a new, please evolve, take flight.
(CHORUS)
Green… What are you waiting for? What you waitin´ for? A written invitation? A public declaration? A private consolation?
Remember when you procrastinate you choose last!
(I think I grew a gray, watching you PROCRASTINATE!) (CHORUS)
well i typed up this whole thing just to have it ruined because of stupidty of the internet. now im just pissed but i will some up the whole ufcking think all over again.
school day was like school, exceptionally boring.
lori figured out why patrick hates/not talks to us, its because of garrett.
(it was wayyyy longer than this but it was gay and didnt want to stay :evil:
so heres a picture and song,
=http://img19.photobucket.com/...
Arrache-Moi by Louise Attaque
Arrache-moi les yeux Que je ne puisse plus voir Arrache-moi les mains Que je ne puisse toucher Arrache-moi les ongles La douleur jusqu'au bout des doigts Arrache-moi le coeur Que je ne puisse plus avoir peur Arrache-moi la tête Que je ne puisse savoir Arrache-moi les oreilles Que je ne puisse t'entendre Arrache-moi les... La douleur jusqu'au bout de moi Arrache-moi le coeur Que je ne puisse plus avoir peur
Song Playing: some song off of moulin rouge Mood: tired of the drama shit in guard Other feelings: me no likes valentines
wel it was another dayfull of drama for the barbe winterguard. its getting ridiculous... i mean you would think all the drama would have ended when half the guard quit but more crap happened with 7 people than it did with 16... dang.. arg... for the rest of the day, it was pretty ok... um took a test in sanders i think i did good on it, i hope at least anyways... um what else.... i have no ideaaaaaaaaaaa
here's a pretty picture and a song... um... im trying to think of a song to put in here... standard lines by dashboard confessional
=http://img19.photobucket.com/...
Which of the bold faced lies will we use? "I hope that you're happy." "you really deserve it" "this will be the best for us both in the end."
But your taste still lingers on my lips like I just placed them upon yours and I starve, I starve for you. But this new diet's liquid and dulling to the senses, And it's crude, but it will do.
Which of the standard lines will we use? "I've been meaning to call you." "I've just been so busy." "We'll catch up soon." Let's make it a point to...
But your taste still lingers on my lips like I just placed them upon yours and I starve, I starve for you. But this new diet's liquid and dulling to the senses, And it's crude, but it will do.
I n f o r m a t i o n 1. name: dianna 2. single or taken: single 3. sex: female 4. birthday: november 14th, 1987 6. siblings: 1 half sis, 1 sis, 2 bros 7. hair color: brown with black 8. eye color:hazel 9. shoe size: 8.5 10. height: 5'6"
r e l a t i o n s h i p s 1. who are your best friends?: no one 2. do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: no :-/
f a s h i o n | s t u f f 1. where is your favorite place to shop: uhh 2. any tattoos or piercings: earings
s p e c i f i c s 1. do you do drugs?: no 2. what kind of shampoo do you use?: iso 3. what are you most scared of?: life and the dark and being alone 5. who is the last person that called you?: son 6. where do you want to get married?: anywhere 7. how many buddies are online right now?: 10 8. what would you change about yourself?: the way i feel about a person
f a v o r i t e s 1. color: silver 2. food: umm 3. boys names: kade, alexander, patrick 4. girls names: jada, mckenzie 5. subjects in school: uhhh 6. animals: puppies 7. sports: uhhh
h a v e | y o u | e v e r 1. given anyone a bath?: haha no 2. smoked:nope 3. bungee jumped?: not yet 4. made yourself throw up?: umm not that i can think of 5. skinny dipped?: this one time.... no haha 6: ever been in love?: im not for sure 7. made yourself cry to get out of trouble?: once 8. pictured your crush naked?: umm.... 9. actually seen your crush naked?: no 10. cried when someone died?: no one i know has died 11. lied: yeah 12. fallen for your best friend?: i dont have best friends, but i once fell for one of my friends, dont do it... 13. been rejected?: yeah 14. rejected someone?: uhhh 15. used someone?: nope 16. done something you regret?: hmm
c u r r e n t clothes: school shirt and cotton shorts music: billy talent: try honesty make up: smeared eyeliner annoyance: nothing at the moment smell: air favorite group: idk desktop picture: jimmy eat world book youre reading: none at the moment cd in player: a bunch of stuff dvd in player: no idea color of toenails: clear
l a s t | p e r s o n you touched: myself hugged: ummm myself you imed: natalie you yelled at: some random person you kissed: outside of family... umm.... patrick..? maybe, i dont know
a r e | y o u understanding: I try to be open-minded: yeah arrogant: sure insecure: definately interesting: not very random: i can be hungry: a little smart: not really moody: no hard working: hahahaha organized: hahahaha healthy: HAHAHA shy: not completely difficult: sometimes attractive: HAHA hell no bored easily: yep messy: a little responsible: when i have to be obsessed: ehh on certain things, yes angry: not really
w h o | d o | y o u | w a n n a kill: no one at the moment slap: caleb look like: no one talk to offline: :-/ talk to online: :-/
r a n d o m in the morning i am: sleepy all i need is: a boyfriend love is: not nice to me i dream about: anything and everything
o p p o s i t e | s e x what do you notice first: eyes last person you slow danced with: honestly, i have no idea worst question to ask: umm i dont know makes you laugh the most: no one really makes you smile: no one who do you have a crush on: a certain guy who has a crush on you: lmfao, absolutely no one, they would have to be OUT of their freakin mind to have a crush on me
d o | y o u | e v e r sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone special to im you?: no, ive lost all hope save conversations: nope wish you were a member of the opposite sex?: not really wish you were younger: no cried because someone said something to you?: not recently
(hey megalomaniac- incubus!!!!)
N u m b e r of times i have had my heart broken: once of hearts i have broken: once of guys ive kissed: 2 of girls ive kissed: 0 of continents i have lived in: 1 of tight friends: uhh negative 5 ... ? of cds i own: a lot of scars on my body: a few, i dont count them
F i n a l | q u e s t i o n s 1. do you like fillings these out?: they occupy my time 5. gold or silver: silver 6. what was the last film you saw at the movies?: uh rotk 7. favorite cartoon/anime? uhhh 8. what did you have for breakfast this morning? uhh nothing. 10. who would you love being locked in a room with? the guy i like 11. could you live without your computer? ehh maybe 12. would you color your hair? its already been colored 13. could you ever get off the computer? yep 14. habla espanol? un poqo (is that right...? donde es loco?!?!) 15. how many people are on your buddy list? 40 16. drink alcohol? no sir
Song Playing: Jimmy Eat World- For Me This is Heaven Mood: sad Other feelings: not caring
hmmm well i was washing towels like 45minutes ago and i looked at the detergent bottle... it said "glacier fresh scent" now how the hell do you know what a glacier smells like, if it should smell like anything it should smell cold, which it doesnt! it just smells like liquid detergent... gah... stupid peoples... (i dont know i have no life, you should know this by now....)
well anyways...
today was a day of boringness... went to school like i always do. went to the same classes that i always go to... lori wasnt here today. and um i think thats it.... came home and ate and did homework... didnt do my essay or my math... but i dont care right about now... umm tonight is the first night we're home without my papa and my mama... :cry: not really... im not scared.(yet...) i hope things go well, cuz we're gonna have to do this all week... yayyyy...(im so estatic...?) i dont know... anyways
i'll put up a picture and that jimmy eat world song i mentioned earlier.
=http://img19.photobucket.com/...
The first star I see, may not be a star. We can't do a thing but wait. So lets wait for one more. And the time, such clumsy time in deciding if it's time. I'm careful, but not sure how it goes. You can lose yourself in your courage.
When the time we have now ends. When the big hand goes round again. Can you still feel the butterflies? Can you still hear the last goodnight?
And the mindless comfort grows, when I'm alone with my great plans. And this is what she says gets her through it: "If I don't let myself be happy now then when?" If not now when?
When the time we have now ends. When the big hand goes round again. Can you still feel the butterflies? Can you still hear the last goodnight?
I close my eyes and believe wherever you are, you're an angel for me.
When the time we have now ends. When the big hand goes round again. Can you still feel the butterflies? Can you still hear the last goodnight?
my tummy hurts :cry: oh well no one cares har dee har har
hmm lets see, guard drama once again, it sucks, maggie's mom is psycho insaneo and thats kinda why we had guard drama saturday... :? hmm what else
ah yes, another depressing holiday coming up, valentine's day... oh joys of joy.... not really. um yeah, some of mes amis are going to twirp, but im going to natalie's instead for a not going to twirp party type thing. i might go eat at miyako's if im lucky(which im probably not lucky, so that means im probably not going to go... :cry: )
umm what else i dont know..... i'll put a picture in here then i'll add a song by diffuser... enjoy..
=http://img19.photobucket.com/...
And I wonder if you ever think about me anymore And I wonder if you ever think about me when your bored And I wonder if you ever think about me when you're hangin' in New York
And I wonder if you still think Bono writes his songs for you And I wonder if the reasons why you left me were untrue And I wonder if you give him better blow jobs than the ones I got from you
Because... Girl you mean So much to me I wish that we.. Could start it over, start it over I don't need your sympathy or apologies Still I'm staring in my coffee cup at six A.M. And I cannot give.. up
And I wonder if you're happy or just glad to see me scarred Took my drunken self-confession sober up your bleeding heart I am bending over backwards to get close to you but still I feel so far
Because... Girl you mean So much to me I wish that we.. Could start it over, start it over I don't need your sympathy or apologies Still I'm staring in my coffee cup at six am And I cannot give.. up
Girl you mean So much to me I wish that we could start it over I don't need your sympathy or apologies ....anymore
Girl you mean So much to me I wish that we.. Could start it over, start it over I don't need your sympathy or apologies I just want you here with me
anyways i went to practice today and it wasnt the greates thing in the world. right now im VERY bored and need to go do something before i implode with boredom.
:cry:
anyways if you wants to do anything PLEASE tell me so
bored, not much happened today, went to school, got checked out and applied for my passport, went back to school. came home and did nothing but think and become depressed now im about to take this quiz so i can occupy my oh so precious time that i do nothing to fill it with, i want to go somewhere with someone but i dont know where or with who....
SIMPLE QUESTIONS: 1.What time is it? 6:33pm 2.What is your name? dianna 3.What is your birthday? nov. 14, 1987 4.How many sibs do you have? 4 5.What are your sibs names? melissa, rachel, caleb, alex 6.Do you have a job? nope 7.If yes, where? 8.If no to #6, where do u want to work: um i dont know 9.Do you have a car? nope 10.What kinda car do you have/want? something that has an air conditioner and a cd player and that runs fairly well and doesnt look like a boat and i dont want a van or station wagon.
FAVORITE QUESTIONS: 11.Movie: rotk 12.Song: um idont know 13.Band: dont know 14.Group: dont know 15.Singer: dont know 16.TV Show: dont know 17.TV Channel: vh1 or mtv 18.Actor: depp of johnny 19.Actress: uhhh 20.Comic: garfield 21.Magazine: um i dont know 22.Food: lo mein from lotus express, or sushi.. 23.Snack: chocolate pudding 24.Drink: water or a&w rootbeer 25.CD-ROM Game: umm 26.Board Game: clue 27.Card Game: gin rummi, or speed or rummi w/e 28.Kid Game: candyland 29.Number: 3 30.Cartoon: spongebob or um family guy or the simpsons or south park 31.Character: plankton 32.Disney Character: umm that lumière off of beauty and the beast 33.Color: silver 34.Hair Color: white 35.Time of the day: 7pm-11pm 36.Day of the week: friday 37.Week of the month: 3rd 38.Month of the Year: october
LOVE LIFE ETC: 39.Do you plan on having children: yes 40.Do you want to get married: yes 41.How old do you wanna be when you have your first child: 27 42.How old do you wanna be when your married: 24/25 43.Would you have kids before marriage? no 44.What would you name the boy? Daniel Kade, but we would call him kade or patrick alexander(yes i do know thats part of my little brother's name and no i wouldnt name my son after him i just like the combination of those two names) 45.What would you name the girl? jada mckenzie, but i would call her mckenzie 46.Are you a virgin?: yes 47.If Yes, Do you plan on loosing your virginity ne time soon?: no, dont think so 48.Have you had oral sex?: nope 49.Have you been past base 1?: well if knew what the bases where, i would tell you 50.Do you even know what the bases are?: nope 51.Do you have a b/f or g/f (who): nope 52.Do you have a crush?: yep
EITHER-OR (PICK WHICH ONE YOU PREFER) 53.Music/TV: music 54.Guys/Girls: both for friends, but for mates guys 55.Green/Blue: blue 56.Pink/Purple: purple 57.Sleep/StayUp: sleep 58.Summer/Winter: winter 59.Spring/Fall: fall 60.Night/Day: night 61.Hangin Out/Chillin: arent they the same 62.Friends/Lovers: both 63.Cold/Warm: cold 64.Fast/Slow: fast 65.New/Old: new 66.Dark/Light: dark 67.Sparkle/Shine: sparkle 68.Peach/Plum: plum 69.Apple/Orange: orange 70.Laundry/Dishes: laundry 71..Christina/Britney: britney 72.Limp Bizkit/KoRn: korn 73.Rock/Rap: rock 74.Pop/R&B: pop
WHAT DO YOU THINK? (PUT WHAT FIRST COMES TO MIND WHEN YOU SEE THE FOLLOWINGWORDS:) 75.Glass: heart 76.Shake: head 77.Club: dance 78.Sing: soft 79.Loud: hurt 80.Garcia: brothers 81.Hair: blue 82.Ching: chang 83.Money: need 84.Work: want 85.Play: time 86.4002: 2004 87.Betty: boop 88.Sara: mayeux 89.Dog: summer 90.Brain: hurt 91.Nick: lachey 92.Frank: sinatra 93.AM: guard 94.FM: radio 95.PM: sleep 96.Morning: bad 97.Ball: jenny
WHAT DO YOU THINK (WRITE WHAT YOU THINK OF THE FOLLOWING) 98.Eminem: white 99.Rap: ok 100.Teenagers: weird 101.Smoking: evil 102.Death: sad 103.Life: pathetic 104.Drinking: evil 105.Bomb Threats: stupid barbe 106.Murder: stupid 107.Suicide: stupid 108.Fear: dark and alone
FRIENDZ: 109.Who is your best friend?: no one 110.Who is the best person to hang with?: uhh lori? 111.Who is the sweetest person?: no one 112.Whos the cutest person: no one 113.Whos the nicest?: no one 114.Whos the best to talk online with?: i dont usually talk to people online 115.Whos the most blonde: lori 116.Whos the weirdest: me 117.Whos the craziest: jennifer 118.Loudest: lori 119.Quietest: sarah 120.Smartest: yogi 121.Quickest: uhh 123.Most Trustful: uhh 124.Most Honest: uhh 125.Most Cheerful: uhh
(Pointless) QUESTIONS: 126.Are you glad it's almost done? um i guess 127.Are you bored? thats why im taking this quiz 128.What kinda mood are you in right now? depressed 129.Did you have a good day today? not entirely 130.What are you doing tomorrow: guard practice 131.What did you do today?: went to school and got my passport
132.What time is it now?: 6:50pm 133.How long has it been since you started?: 27min 134.Why is pickle juice green?: because it reflects that color 135.Do you shave? yes 136.Why? because idont like hair other than on my head 137.What color is your razor? blue, i think...? 138.What size is your bed? twin 139.Do you like it? nope 140.You're going on a date for a walk around the lake then a restaurant or a cafe, where do u wanna go? cafe 141.What do you wear FROM your closet? pants 142.Would you go naked in a bathtub with a naked old man/woman with each of you having a bar of soap and soap each other till the bars of soap run out for a million dollars? no 143.Letter or e-mail? letter 144.Buttons or boxes? boxes 145.What's something a guy/girl will wear that'll turn you off? a tight purple sparkly muscle shirt... 146.What's something a guy/girl will wear that'll turn you on? nothingat all, haha im jk, or am i... 147.What do you think of soulmates? wish i could find mine 148.Florida or California? cali 149.Is cussing a necessity in life? nope 150.What's an object you can't live without? music 151.Can you live without the microwave? probably 152.You have this uh, erotic dream about your friend of the opp. sex. how do you act and feel around that friend the next day? like i would normally 153.Would you rather be rich with 15 spoiled brats or just barely making it with a dog? neither 154.How's your schoolwork for you right now? a lot 155.What's something someone's done to make you hold a grudge against them? um i dont think i have a grudge against anyone 156.Favorite weather: rainy 157.What's one look trait that attracts you to a guy/girl? eeyes 158.What's one personality trait that attracts you to a guy/girl? funny 159.Do you know what 143 means? yes 160.Who's phone number are you hoping to get? no ones 161.Do you beleive in ghosts? Why or Why not? i dont know 162.What time did you sleep last night? 11ish 163.Which guy/girl do you wish to be with RIGHT now? ehh... 164.Is it right to flirt if you have a bf/gf? nope 165.Would you rather be married in Venice, Italy, or Honolulu, Hawaii? italy 166.Would you rather eat sandwiches or pasta for the rest of your life? pasta 167.How would you feel if you got a flower from a guy? confused 168.Do you want to drop school? nope 169.What do you think of the word, "no pain, no gain" ? ouch 170.What do you think of the quote "eyes are the passageways into the soul" ? its not always right 171.What do you think of sleep? good 172.Waffles or pancakes? waffles 173.How's your cereal in your bowl? dry 174.What's an annoying trait about you? umm im annoying 175.Football or rugby? RUGBY 176.Hat or visor? hat 177.Ice skating or rollerblading? ice skating 178.Your boyfriend has hair you love. he comes to school the next day with a shiny head. what do you HONESTLY think? why did you do that... 179.Pizza or burgers? pizza 180.What color is your jacket? grey 181.What's something you ALWAYS have on you? my necklace 182.What do you think of guys with nailpolishes? i dont know 183.Do you stay in bed thinking or do you fall alseep in 5 seconds? thinking 184.Would you rather go to a boarding school, private school, or an all girls or guys school? private school 185.There's a high school that'll be on a cruise ship and you have the opportunity to go. it's your last year at school. do you go for it? depends 186.Who do you want to take with you to the prom? i dont know 187.Is cyber sex considered cheating? yes 188.How do you react to change? good 189.Are you happy? nope 190.Favorite berries: straw 191.What's one facial feature you'd like to change about yourself? everything 192.Do you take a shower after a bath? shower 193.What's color's your towel? there are multiple towels 194.What do you think of knuckle cracking? i do it 195.What was the last thing you cried over or got teary about? my thinking about the bast 196.Chalk or crayons? crayons 197.How's you happiness level right now? -5 198.Coffee, tea, or me? coffee 199.Wouldn't you just love to hug someone right now? yes 200.Who was the last person who complimented you? um no one 201.Do you know what an aphrodisiac is? yes 202.Who do you wish you could kiss? a certain person 203.Movies at home on in a theater? theater 204.Wanna live in a castle? yep 205.What coat do you wear in the winter? my grey hoodie 206.What's something about guys you don't get? why they are so stupid at some times 207.Who was better in rush hour/rush hour 2? uhh 208.It someone said you were hot, what would you think? what the hell are you thinking 209.You go to your bf/gf's house for the first time and in his/her room, and everywhere is... you. what do you think? .... question mark..... 210.What happens when you hear the word Christmas? depressing 211.Does being a psycho sound appealing? yes 212.What food brings back good memories? nothing 213.Do you talk to yourself? of course 214.Sun or moon? moon 215.What's your opinion on love? its good if you gave it 216.What's a happy memory of a time you've spent with the opp. sex? ... none that i can bring up at the time 217.Would you rather go ballroom dancing or square dancing? square dancing, yeehaw 218.Do you think you can afford to lose weight? most definately 219.If you could dye your hair any color, what would you dye it? silver 220.What's the nicest thing any one has ever told you? ummm, i cant think of anything
Do you..? 221.Believe in god? yes 222.Sleep w/ or w/out clothes on? a t shirt and thats usually it 223.Dress up on halloween? yep, if i feel the need 224.Like to travel? yes 225.Sleep on your side, tummy, or back? mostly tummy, sometimes side 226.Think you're attractive? hell no 227.Have a goldfish? nope 228.Ever have the falling dream? yes 229.Have stuffed animals? yes 230.Go on vacation? yes 231.Believe in magic? not intirely 232.Have to pay bills? nope 233.Do your own laundry? sometimes 234.Clean your house? sometimes 235.Own a furby? used to 236.Stink? not at the moment 237.Believe in the devil? yes 238.Like guys or girls? guys 239.Like long or short hair? umm depends 240.Like hugs? yes 241.Like kisses? yes 242.Like it when its raining? yes 243.Snowing? yes 244.When itz sunny? not really 245.Swallow or spit? spiy 246.Have a job? nope 247.Keep a diary? this wonderful blog 248.Wear make-up? just eyeliner 249.Like school or h/w? no 250.Like long surveys? sometimes 251.Wear glasses? no 252.Sing in the shower? yes 253.Have any peircings? yes 254.Want to kill sumone? not at the moment 255.Love someone at the moment? i dont think its love
HAVE YOU EVER 256.Smoked- no 257.Been Drunk- no 258.Been High- no 259.Rolled Down a Hill- yes 260.Fell Out of A chair- yes 261.Broke into a building- my house 262.Been Arrested- no 263.Stolen a car- no 264.Lied- yes 265.Cheated on a Game- yes 266.Cheated on your B/f or g/f- no 267.Had a Job- no 268.Murdered someone- no 269.Been in a fist fight- no 270.Been in a cat fight- no 271.Been beat up- no 272.Been Bitch slapped- no 273.Thrown a party- birthday for myself, har har 274.Ate a muffin- yes 275.Killed an animal- no 276.Ran something over- no 27.Flicked someone off- yes 278.Been Cow Tippin-no 279. Had sex-no 280. Been Pregnant- no 281.Doyou like your name?: no 282. Time Finished: 7:05pm
every single choice you make in your life will effect everything, from what clothes you wear one day, if you decide to paint your nails, to when you talk to people and when you dont. every single choice you make will effect how your life ends. ive just realized this, like deeply, and its really scary. and also life is never has "unfortunate accidents". i dont think anything is an accident, everything happens for a purpose. i dont know why though, it just is. and i dont know how my life is going to end. its just scary thinking about how even when im blogging right now, it is effecting my life in some way i dont even comprehend. i dont know what on earth has compelled me to think like this, i really dont know if its a good or bad thing, because its making me depressed to think about it, but what if i had never even contemplated this idea, i wouldnt be all sad/depressed like, so how would i be feeling if i hadnt stumbled across this frightening realization.... i dont know, and now i never will... i will NEVER know, i will never experience the bliss of not knowing to be conscious of every single decision i make... well, actually, i knew it because when youre little you dont realize this, but now i do, and its like when you figured out that santa isnt real, at one point and time, you believed and you were so excited when christmas was coming and you couldnt wait for santa to get there, but know that you know that he isnt real, you cant have that same joy...(well its sorta like this but not completely, i hope you understand...)
ser·en·dip·i·ty- The faculty of making fortunate discoveries by accident.
i am aware that everything that happens to me is not an accident.. so when my heart was broken, it wasnt an accident... if i break my arm by tripping on a little pebble, it wont be an accident... if i find 20 dollars on the ground, it wont be an accident.. if somebody bumps into me, it wont be an accident. for some reason it happened on purpose,and nobody knows why..
yeah, thats right, forever... well at least in here...